Chosen Loss
by SamCyberCat
Summary: Ryo had made his own choices to remove the bonds he’d once had with Samejima, Shou and Fubuki. Ryo/Fubuki.


Notes – For the gx_100. Set at the end of season two, not long after the Genex Tournament was finished.

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Lonely was a concept that applied to other people.

There were people who desired the company of others all the time and there were people who enjoyed their own company more than having anyone else with them. It was people who fell into the first category who felt lonely. Loners were not lonely.

Even if that was not strictly true it was true in the case of Hell Kaiser Ryo. It always had been, even back in the days when he had called others his friends and permitted them to have his company he hadn't really needed them. The change in his life only helped to enforce this notion.

Ryo was a Pro League duellist. His work was his life and his life didn't stop for anyone, so he did not have any friends. All he cared for was victory. For the next opponent to take the stand and for him to destroy them.

He could do that on his own, without the help of anyone.

And so he made sure that the victories did not stop, that even when he had to confront those he'd known, Samejima, Fubuki and Shou, they were defeated knowing that Ryo did not need their pity. He was a person, just a different person to the one that they had accepted before.

He left them behind for a while. Just before the tournament was over he slipped out of sight and mind, allowing for Rei to take the title shot against Manjoume. He hadn't cared for the match up anyway and felt that Rei deserved a chance to become an independent person as he had done.

The end of the tournament meant that he could go back to being a Pro League star, back to his new life. Which he lived alone.

But something was suddenly different now.

The memories of his duels against those three who had once been important to him played fresh in his mind. The looks of pure concern and determination to find out what had happened to the person they had treasured. And even worse, the looks of acceptance they given him when they'd lost.

Hadn't their acceptance been what Ryo had wanted all along?

For the first time since Monkey had changed him into what he was today, Ryo thought about what he had lost.

Childhood was gone. So never again would he be the young student, listening eagerly to Samejima's teaching of the Cyber Style, while being just as eager to impress him with the skills he'd learned. But those days had been gone long before Ryo had become Hell Kaiser. The difference being the before, even though those days had gone, Ryo still talked to Samejima. Everyday he'd visit the man's office to talk with him. They had been friends.

Family was gone. Ryo had to remove himself from Shou's life if he ever wanted the younger Marufuji to become the duellist he had the potential to be. Shou was too soft. So Ryo had taught him not to be that way by using harsh words. Even before the change Ryo had never been gentle to Shou. The difference was that back then underneath all the anger and misunderstanding had been two brothers who cared for each other. Now all that was there were two independent people, striving for success.

Friends, and he was going to be honest, romance too, were gone. So Ryo could no longer release the stress of a day's studying by watching Fubuki do whatever crazy antics the other boy had planned. That too had been left when Ryo had moved on from the academia, but Fubuki had always said it didn't have to. It was Ryo who had chosen to break the tie. They were no longer the partners they had been.

Teacher, family and lover, all gone.

Looking at them individually made it not seem so bad, but when he put it all together like that it really hit him just how much he had lost in his growth.

And for the first time Ryo felt lonely.

He recognised the pang in his chest, knowing that it hurt him so much. But Ryo was not the sort of person to let something that was bothering him continue to affect his life. He was also not grown up yet.

Perhaps he wouldn't be able to deal with these problems until he had fully matured. So he made the choice to not come back to any of them while he had doubt. The decisions he had made by becoming Hell Kaiser would be something he would see through, so he couldn't go back now. When he was ready he would face teacher, family and lover once more he would return to them.

But for now Hell Kaiser Ryo would live with loneliness.


End file.
